its rare i lay down and cannot sleep. i'm a third shifter usually if you just say a word that rhymes with 'bed' or 'sleep' i pass out on command. but for whatever reason i'm nervous as fuck about tonight. i get nervous when i loose people, and even moreso when its permanent. and imagine all that stress and hit yourself with it once a week for the last three weeks. first andrew left, then nate left, now chuck quit. well actually he probably would still have a job but i green-flagged higher adminsitration to let that fucker go. chuck. he was a part of my crew. that was until last night. honest to god he was the best worker i had. the best senior official i had for SURE, and by far the most loyal to the things i'm paid to make sure happen. he came into work last night drunk as a bitch. and i'm not talking a few social beers buzzed i'm talking about full-blown stumbling ass drunk. he came in, picks up the airphone. those are the white 'telephones' you hear people paging other employees while your digging through out of place items on shelves or looking for sale items that just aren't there. anyways he picks that fucking thing up and screams "WE'RE CLOSED". keep in mind its a quad hour before 23:00 hours but still, you dont fucking do that shit. you especially don't even fantasize about doing that shit when i'm in charge. well he did. then he paged me on the airphone. i just happened to have one of those gay fucking headsets on, that you might see people with in the store. he said "HOW'S LOAD LOOKING TONIGHT!??!?!?". I spit the specs at him and he told me he was drunk. anyways i'm busy as mother fucker splitting the load with my new (appointed by ppl who have NO FUCKING IDEA what goes on, on my shift) assistant who just so happens to have this interesting feature that he comes with. every ten or fifteen minutes he wanders off for about that that time. add that shit up and tell me where your fucking manhours have went! that's what they'll be asking me. anyways, its about 23:30 and i'm like "where's chuck?" because he's always early, always on that "what's the objective, boss?" and i'm QUOTING him. he was that much of a "respectable" being when he was at work. shirt always tucked in, never spoke about outside of work at work, nothing. he was a machine. we even poked fun about him on break when he first started because he walks with such enthusism. he said he used to have drinking problem back in the day. before he met his woman. the one who straightened him out. the one who recently broke up with him. or so that's what see seemed to have wanted, but then when the reality of him being gone set in, suddenly she wanted him back! imagine that!!! anyways. they "were serious" i guess. rings and all. she wore one. anyways, they broke up. he's been avoiding her. she's been trying (at horrible-near-call-the-police levels) to try and get ahold of him. caused hell at the store, gave nate a bunch of shit when he was still manager. HER: "you can't tell me to leave, i wanna speak to a manger!" HIM: "i am the fucking manger." anyways, moving right along. i come to find, from a customer giving a weird look at the ground and walking away (i couldn't see what they were looking at there were several 8ft pallets blocking my view), CHUCK IS PASSED OUT DRUNK ON A STACK OF FUCKING PALLETS. dont' believe me? i needed grounds to fire him, [i got PROOF](http://flickr.com/photos/mesh/tags/howtogetfiredfromyourjob/)! we tried FUCKING EVERYTHING IMAGINABLE TO WAKE HIM UP. chase dropped an empty pallet (like the one you see him sleeping on) right next to him. that's what caused him to put his arms in his shirt and roll over as you see in the second image.. johnathon drove the electric pallet jack next to him and just laid on the horn. loud ass horn. someone even dropped a stack of cans next to him. nothing. i figure this is the worst thing you can do to me. wouldn't you agree? look at the presentation he's giving people who just want to grocery shop for that one thing and get the fuck out of there. chucks passed out smelling like fucking beir mode at the end of aisle six. i figured i had no choice but to fuck with him back as he did me. walked to aisle two. ME: "CHASE GET A HOLD OF HIS EX AND GET HER UP HERE TO WAKE HIM UP" the last person he wants to see will now be the first once he wakes. and oh boy he did. first he tried to rush chase for calling her, but i didn't let that shit happen. CHUCK: "WILLIAM ITS BEEN FUN!" he walked to the the time clock and punched out left. that alone won't cost you your job. hell it wouldn't cost you anything if you were in good with the management. but i dropped the hammer. i got him for time theft and and sleeping on the job. each hold a five day suspension. more than one or a combo of the two.. you suddenly loose a paycheck from that day forward. goodbye chuck. and by the way.. that dark time i mentioned a few days ago, or maybe even yesterday. that dark time thats going to be happening.. it started at 23:47 last night. were down to five people. those five people, someway, somehow, are expected to open 1300 boxes tonight and put whatever it is in those boxes on the shelf, and make the store all pretty. how much do you get paid an hour?