I had an incredibly shitty day at work, which seems to be the normal routine as of late on Wednesdays. Mondays are bad too. Thursdays seem to go by pretty smoothly but we have two of the best cooks in the kitchen that day so that probably has a lot to do with it.  The only part of Thursdays that can get a little hairy is Z's attitude in the back (which is nothing in comparison to what I put everybody through on Mondays or Wednesdays), so I try and do whatever I can to help her out on that day.  Jon doesn't mind being solo in the kitchen, so it seems to work out rather well. Regardless the reasons that a majority of the workdays do not seem to work is because of my inability to deal with Susan properly.  As I had stated Sunday to both Jake and Jon on the line―when you have an issue with someone you have to first think that it might be you, yourself causing the situation, but when the entire world seems to have a problem with them as well your inability to deal with that person might be legitimate.  And as much as the ladies up front would like to lead the cooks to believe that they _hate Sue too―_the reality is that is complete bullshit.  They _love Sue_ and would be fucking lost without her.  The ladies in the morning are like stone, set in their ways, unable to change.  The water flows through them, they are not water. It's fucking sad, Dennis got really close to turning the place into a genuine Greek restaurant, something the area could genuinely use.  The hardworking men of the area demand it, but the ladies are not letting it happen.  The cooks are shapeable and ready to commit to any changes that might get set in place.  Especially to any TSO that is still there now, if you're still there, you probably could get through anything else Dennis could throw at you. Regardless, dealing with Susan is a day-to-day problem at work and I'm not sure what the end result of that will be.  Everybody talks about how it will be when she is gone, but the reality is that she never will be gone.  I just need to figure out how to line up the stars in the sky correctly so she doesn't seem to bother me as much.  But it just too unfair!  Nobody should be expected to leave work so fucking riled up over a single person, for any reason.  I shave my head so I have nothing to rip out when I'm stressed out about work.  When the vibe is right, I hear the ladies talk amongst themselves through the beat-in- blue counter about how beautiful the plates look.  But then they take the scenic route throughout the restaurant and stack fucking tickets so regardless of whether or not I have just cooked something amazing, I'm three or four tickets deep and trying to man the grill and dress up plates all sexy at the same time―_it makes me loose my fucking mind._ But at the same time I feel like a bitch, like I should be able to do it all alone and not have an issue.  Zack just did on Hell's Kitchen, finishing a whole service by his **god-damn self**. Incredible! Started cooking dinner before 5PM today and had it finished by the time the Wife had arrived home.  She tidied herself up a bit and we sat and watched episode 2-6 of Hell's Kitchen.  Amazing to see, again and again, how removing someone from a team can substantially make them _better_ despite them being gone.  Sometimes I wonder if the ladies up front feel that way about me.  Like maybe their lives at work would be better if I was not around.  Too often it is pondered how they genuinely feel about me.  They worked with me for all those years, but I didn't have a pair of balls to speak my mind about anything―just following the crowd with whatever they me to be.  Incredibly stupid shit, and I promise you sometime between the first time I shook Dennis' hand the now I grew up a few times over.  I have no problems letting people around me know how I feel about something at the exact moment that it happens.  I used to have problems barking orders at dishwashers, but now I'll drag any of them through the mud. Do this, do that.  Good work, go fuck, see you later!  But back to dinner. Made basmati rice and topped it with steamed peas, edamame (first time having this!), and black beans.  Zig-zagged the fucker with soy sauce ever so slightly―you gotta live a little, right?