Tried really hard to get into the spirit of Christmas this year, but so many things just seem to be slipping away.  It was such an eye opening experience being with Kristin.  I can't believe how far away I've become.  I should really quiet down more, because I'm not the person I used to be anymore.  I don't care about feelings like that, and it disgusts me in some ways.  That guy Jordan Peterson was describing in the book his friend who he had over one night and ruined the whole vibe of the house; that's totally me. _I still kind of want to try and watch Midnight Clear still this year.._